Musings during the Pandemic #30

Being a father is a huge responsibility for any person. I believe that there is no such thing as a perfect father. If you were brought up in an environment where your father is usually present, is loving and supportive, encouraging and affirming, then you can consider yourself most blessed and fortunate. Many do not have this luxury growing up.

I grew up in an environment where my dad worked shifts and the usual scenario for me growing up is seeing him sleeping in his room. All his promises of taking us to the beach, to the funfair, to the park usually remains a promise, usually never fulfilled. My dad works hard for our family and he showed us his love by doing his best to provide for us. Just like many families in the 70s, money is hard to come by and we made do without many of the luxuries afforded to our children today.

My relationship with God the Father in my younger days where not like what it is today. Like it or not, how we see our earthly father is usually how we relate to God. As I do not have a close relationship with my earthly father, I too have the impression that God is more concerned with his own things than to spend his time with me.

I thank God that He has led me to the right people and community where I have learnt and accepted that my earthly father is not perfect and through their guidance and support, I have forgiven my earthly father for not being present in my life, for putting other things first and not me, for not believing in me.

I realised that I had sometimes put an unrealistic expectation on my dad which makes it impossible for him to be a dad for me – I realised now that for most of the time, my dad was trying his best to give me and my family the best he can. Being a dad myself now, I know we are doing our best to provide for our family and to be available for our children. I love my children with all my heart. But there are times when due to circumstances beyond my control, I let them down and I could see the disappointment in their faces.

By the grace of God, I was led to forgive my father during a Life in the Spirit seminar I attended and the moment I did that and decided to come back to God, I felt God amazing love embracing me. Just like the story of the prodigal son, God ran to me and embraced me, and filled me with His love.Now I invite you to close your eyes and think about your father – for those whose father is no longer with you, to also think of him – and all the things he had done, especially things that has hurt you – all the hurtful things he has said to you or to your mum or your brothers and sisters – and I invite you to surrender all these to God the father – surrender all these hurt to the Lord and ask Him to give you the strength to forgive your earthly father and release him to the Lord.

May your act of forgiveness bring newness to your relationship with your earthly father as well as with our heavenly Father. Time is too precious to waste thinking about things and not doing it. Just like the tagline of Nike, Just do it!

Dearest Father,
Thank you for loving me and bringing me to where I am today.

Everything I am is because of Your plans for me,
plans to prosper me and not to harm me,
plans to give me hope and a future.
Amen.